A few years ago, I sat on Zoom with a client—a brilliant woman with degrees, accolades, and an impressive resume—on the verge of quitting her job. She wasn’t burnt out from the work itself.
She wasn’t even switching industries (yet). She was exhausted from trying to read her manager’s mind, constantly feeling like she was one step behind.
Sound familiar?
Here’s the truth: Most managers won’t tell you what they really want. Not because they’re withholding. Not because they’re bad people. Sometimes, they’re just too overwhelmed, untrained, or unsure themselves. Or perhaps they’re burnt out from dealing with and being the buffer with your leadership team.
But after years of coaching professionals across industries, I can tell you what they wish you knew. And knowing it might just be the edge you need to not only survive at work—but thrive.
1. Please— just ask
Managers carry invisible loads; pressure from leadership, budget stress, and team dynamics. It’s easy to forget they’re juggling just as much, sometimes more, than you are.
The employees who stand out are rarely the ones with the flashiest presentations or the longest tenure. They’re the ones who ask a simple but powerful question: “What are your top priorities right now, and how can I help?”
When I managed a large team, the people who made my life easier by understanding the bigger picture? They rose the fastest. Not because they were the smartest, but because they aligned their work with what actually mattered.
We were both less frustrated because they asked what they should focus on and followed through.
If your boss seems disorganized or unclear, don’t assume they’re incompetent. Ask better questions. Clarify. Repeat back what you heard. That act alone shifts the dynamic and makes you someone your boss can rely on. And it’s rare so it’ll set you apart.
2. You’re in charge of your time—so act like it
No one will manage your time for you—not even your most well-meaning manager. In fact, the highest performers I coach all have one skill in common: they manage their time like it’s money. Because it is.
Stop letting your inbox dictate your day. Stop letting your calendar fill up with meetings that don’t serve your goals. Block out time for focused work. Protect it like you would a client meeting.
If your manager needs you to shift focus, they’ll tell you. Until then, be your own time bodyguard.
And while we’re at it—ditch the 47-item to-do list. Productivity isn’t about checking boxes. It’s about finishing the work that matters. Start your day with one question: “What’s the most important thing I can complete today?” Then do it.
That alone will make you stand out more than any new software certification or MBA.
3. I don’t expect you to stay forever—but I do hope you grow while you’re here
The modern workplace has changed. Loyalty is no longer measured in decades; it’s measured in impact. And impact doesn’t require 20 years—it requires intention.
Maybe you’re thinking about changing industries altogether. That’s not a betrayal. That’s growth. And a good manager? They’ll support it—if you let them in on your journey.
Tell them where you want to go. Share your goals. You might be surprised how much guidance, insight, or even networking help they’re willing to offer.
Your transferable skills—communication, leadership, problem-solving—those are gold. You don’t need to start from scratch. You just need to learn how to tell your story in a way that makes sense across industries.
Sometimes, that story needs a little shaping. That’s where coaching can help.
Related article: Shattering the Glass Ceiling: Strategies for Women in Leadership
4. You don’t have to love me—but you do need to talk to me
Conflict happens. Always. Whether you’re in finance or fashion or running your own business. What matters is how you handle it.
One of the things I teach my clients is the “Week Rule.” If something bothers you for more than a week, it’s time to address it. Not with a passive-aggressive Slack. Not with a cryptic comment in a team meeting. A real, calm, and professional conversation.
You don’t have to confront every annoyance. But the ones that linger? They erode trust, performance, and morale—yours and your manager’s. Say something. Ask for clarity. Approach it with curiosity, not blame.
The managers I’ve worked with over the years aren’t looking for perfect employees. They’re looking for adults. People who own their mistakes, ask questions, speak up when needed, and—most importantly—don’t let resentment build in the dark.
5. If it’s time to move on, move on—with clarity and grace
Sometimes, no amount of coaching, communication, or time-blocking will fix it. The role, the industry, the culture—it just isn’t right. And that’s okay.
But before you leap, get clear on your why. Is it burnout? Boredom? A deeper misalignment? You don’t want to change jobs and carry the same problems into a new role. Reflect first, then pivot.
And if that pivot leads to entrepreneurship? Beautiful. Just be smart about it. Protect your assets. Register your business properly. Build real connections, not just leads.
The skills you’re honing now—time management, clarity, communication—are the exact ones that will make you a successful founder. The Collective is here to help if starting a side hustle is on your mind.
Related article: Best Work Life Balance Jobs: Work Smarter, Live Better
Here’s the real secret:
Your manager doesn’t need you to be perfect. They don’t need you to say yes to everything, work weekends, or read their mind. They need you to show up—with clarity, ownership, and an open line of communication.
When you do that, you don’t just become a great employee.
You become the kind of professional who could run the show one day. And maybe, just maybe, someone else will be writing a post about you—the manager they always wished they had.
